Are You Comfortable Saying No?
NO! That word alone needs no further explanation. If you truly aren’t interested in something, that should
be your first answer, your last answer, and your best answer. There are so many things that will compete
for you time: friends, relatives, everyday life issues. Truth be told, not everything or everyone deserves
your attention. Sure, you may have a big heart and a strong desire to help people, but that shouldn’t be
done at the risk of hurting yourself. Having a heart is one thing. Professional and personal denigration is
In order for your dreams to be realized, you’re going to have to eliminate negative influences, and most
importantly, you have to first celebrate yourself. Celebrating yourself is a key element in achieving the
success that you desire. If you already understand what it is that you want to do and you understand what
you are willing to accept, then rejecting things not germane to your goals must be rejected. Go ahead;
practice saying no.
Being Comfortable Saying No
Let’s come to an understanding about something right now. In order for you to be successful, you’re
going to have to say no. Does that mean you’re going to face rejection? Yes. Does that mean that you
might be perceived as an a-hole? Certainly. Think about all of the times you agreed to something that you
really didn’t believe in. Where did that get you? What could you have done with all of that lost time?
Saying yes when you really aren’t interested doesn’t make you a nice person. It makes you foolish, better
I can speak on this because I was once that person. A little bit about me: I’m a licensed and ordained
minister from Chicago. I don’t fit the stereotypical mould of someone with those credentials. I love to help
others, but I did so at the expense of my family and myself. After 20 long years of kidney failure and
dialysis, I finally received a transplant – a new lease on life. It hit me – I can’t please everyone, so don’t
try. It’s okay to say no.
While recovering from complications after my surgery, there were event
invitations I had to turn down. Before the transplant, I would’ve attended, even though I had absolutely no
interest in going. Because of my recovery, I was FORCED to say no. People weren’t used to hearing that.
I think some of them thought I was Superman. Here’s why. If I had a bad dialysis treatment, I would go. If
I was exhausted from work and ministry, I would go. If I wanted to spend time with my family instead, I
would go. This time I said no. You know what happened? So-called best friends are no longer friends;
certain ministry partners no longer talk to me; certain music partners stopped calling. The beautiful thing
about it is I’m much, much happier.
Your right to say no is a shield. There’s no need for you to die on the inside because of your desire to
people please. Sometimes you have to extend your arm and raise your middle finger high to the leeches of
this world. Your true friends and partners will understand. Saying no to something isn’t cause for a
disagreement. Celebrate yourself by only being involved with people and things that are deserving of your
time. You can’t be real with the world until you can be real with yourself. If you aren’t interested, if you
don’t have time or simply don’t want to deal with it, just say no.
Are You Comfortable Saying No?
Article By William Jackson of
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